I took a trip to the post office this morning, which I know, thanks to Al, is always a bad idea.
The post office is one exit (3 miles on the highway) away from my current home (probably about 9 miles door to door) and I have been there before. But just to be on the safe side, I put the P.O. address into the GPS and was on my way. I notice that the GPS had me going two exits instead of one and don't think much of it. Perhaps the P.O. really is closer to that next exit and it takes less time. Mistake #1: Trusting the GPS! (Some might argue Mistake #1 is going to the P.O. in the first place, but it was a necessary trip.) I continue down the road, which apparently has been rerouted since the GPS was made because the GPS chimes to 'take the exit right' as I am
passing the exit! GRRRR By now, I'm positive that my 'one exit away' option would have been best. Now I'm three exits away and at this point, the exits are for... DISNEY WORLD! God help me. I take the next 'exit right' for "Animal Kingdom" where I do not want to go, and end up on Route 192. If you've never been to Central Florida, 192 is pretty much tourist hell. If it's a low to mid-scale chain restaurant (think Sizzler, Golden Corral, Ruby Tuesday) you'll find it on 192. You'll also find a lot of cheap hotels and motels (with outside doors!) and out of state license plates or white Dodge caravans with an enterprise sticker in the window. In other words, folks who have no clue where they are! (At this point, I know where I am but cannot get to my destination!) Luckily it's September and the number of tourists has greatly decreased since last month. Upon driving down 192, I see signs for Celebration and realize I have made a 270 degree curve around where I actually want to be. Fantastic. To add insult to injury, when I am finally stopped on 192, sitting at the light to turn left to get me to the town where the P.O. is located, I see a sign that says "Post office" with a left arrow. Gee thanks. I finally 'reach my destination' only to discover that there is street parking only. Fantastic. Do I know how to parallel park? Not so much! In fact, not at all, really. I can steer the car very well forwards, make U turns (in legal places), and even back out of a parking space. But manuevering backwards to the side? Please. Luckily, by some miracle of God, there are 2 spaces in a row open, so I am able to get the car in with no problem. It takes 30 minutes to travel less than 10 miles East. And I'm in a car, not on a bike.
I am happy to report that I made it to the P.O. only to be told that the zip code was incorrect on one of my boxes. It is addressed to a family member who apparently doesn't know where she lives.
On the way home from the P.O. I have another mishap. Stupid me sets the destination to 'home' thinking surely the GPS will take me back out to I-4 (one exit away!) and back to the condo. Wishful thinking. I am stuck behind an idiot driving 25 MPH the whole way. I channel Mom but do not act upon any negative thoughts. I continue along and notice signs for I-4 ahead. Awesome! I think that the GPS is right and I'm almost there. Well.... Dummy me again listens to the GPS, doesn't see the final 'turn here for I-4' sign, and ends up back on 192. Seriously?!
In summary, I'm so glad I have this really expensive interactive satelite map to get me where I need to go in an efficient manner. I would have been better off confirming my hunch on googlemaps before I left- would have saved time and gas. But then I would have never written this blog post.
